Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Being Honest
I feel like sometimes this blog is so flowery. That most blogs only share the good times and I'm definitely guilty of that. Well today I'm tired. My child is teething at only 4 months. She is sleeping like crap and getting up super early providing me with little sleep and therefore little ability to cope. I feel like everytime I try to go somewhere she is grumpy and crying and 90% of the time I just leave early cause she is crying...LOUD. I sometimes feel like such a crappy mom cause I lost patience with her and just want her to sleep. I worry all the time that she isn't developing like she is supposed to and every time I take her to physio they try to tell me something else that is strange and stress me out. Don't get me wrong I love my Quinny Bear more than I ever thought possible but being a stay at home mom is hard. Sometimes I feel like it is a thankless job and I miss working as a nurse and feeling like the things I'm doing everyday are worth something. Basically I'm just tired and keep hoping that tomorrow will be a better day. Here's to hoping.
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11 comments :
Well, I feel pretty random, I am friends wth Amy Erickson and was just blog browsing and came across your blog from a link on hers.
I know how you feel, I have one little 7 month old baby and it's not easy adjusting to being a stay-at-home mom, you're right it is not all "flowery" all the time! I watch this video a lot, I don't know if you've seen it, but hopefully it can brighten your day! here's the link!
http://lds.org/pages/motherhood?lang=eng&query=mormon+messages+motherhood
Erin, your not the only one that feels this way. Believe me, I'm having my share of crappy days as well. Jonah has also started to teeth and lets just say it's not the best time i've ever had. Jonah not sleeping+Mom not sleeping = grouchy Mom.
Things will start looking up. This stage won't last forever...right? You are an awesome Mom!
Erin I am glad you posted this because I think all new moms feel like this. When I have these thoughts I think, ughgh maybe I am just a wimp, so it is nice to hear other moms feel the same way. It is a good thing Quinn is super cute so not matter how fussy she is! Hang in there, this stage will pass quickly and then you can be annoyed at the biting stage and get into everything stage!
Erin, you are SO not alone my dear! Honestly, being a mom is HARD, never-ending, tiresome work. A lot of my days seem to drag onnn and onnnn and I feel like I'm grasping at straws trying to find some sanity. It doesn't help when there's a GRUMPY baby or toddler constantly screaming for attention. I OFTEN lose my patience with Emily, and it really takes a lot for me to be HAPPY sometimes. Honestly, there's no sugar coating it. It can be SUCKY. What I've learned is that babies cry... especially when they're teething! I would sometimes have to just leave the room and let Emily wail for awhile while I relaxed and re-focused, otherwise I'd just get overwhelmed. And whenever that baby girl smiles at you... hold on to that moment and feed off of it when you're feeling down. :) It's the best medicine.
After my epistle... Good luck, lady! I'll be thinkin' about ya! Better days ARE ahead, don't you worry!
so I came up with a solution for how you can get more sleep etc! I am home soon and don't start work for a while so...I will come over and play with Quinn and Rocko and you can have naps! I think it's a pretty good deal for me! I told jace I am stealing Dex too! K! See you in 18 days yay!!!
I'm going to add to the census, and say that you are not the only mom who feels like that. I think moms that dont have those feelings are weird. And lying. I had really bad postpartum so the first 6 months were hell. He was grumpy and I was miserable and nobody was sleeping. But it gets better, and easier. We still have days where Jarett is up at night and awake at 5am (such as today) and I loose my patience (such as today). You can only do your best and tomorrow is a new day. Dont hesitate to ask someone for help too. The world looks way better after a nap or good nights sleep. Good luck!
Seriously make sure to schedule in some nap time. Honestly, no one can make you feel as good as some good relax/sleep time. Have someone watch Quinn for 3-4 hours because 2 hours is not enough (I am definitely available) and just relax at home and have a nap. And DON'T worry about her being fussy or crying the whole time for the babysitter - she'll survive. You need times like that so YOU can survive too! Love ya
Just chiming in that I know how you feel. Being a mother is hard, especially those first months with the first one. I can remember days blending into nights where Matthias would need to be held and I was thinking what have I gotten myself into! It is hard work that might seem unnoticed but I promise you that Heavenly Father is proud of you. There are others who see your hard work and appreciate the sacrifice you put in.
One talk I love to read when I am down is Elder Maxwell's Women of God. The quote that gets to me is- "You rock a sobbing child without wondering if today’s world is passing you by, because you know you hold tomorrow tightly in your arms." I know I need that reminder that I hold sweet, special spirits in my arms and that I am doing a good job.
You have good advice here. Have someone watch Quinn and take a nap. Call a friend and vent. Get out of the house, even if Quinn is fussy. Get Tyler to give both Quinn and you blessings!
As Elder Wirthlin said, "Come what may and love it!"
SISTER,
Be thankful you don't have a 2 year old locking you in rooms. You are a great Mom! I know I've seen it. SEE YOU SOOON!!!
P.S. Call me, I'm sick of feeling like a stalker.
Seriously, no one told me how hard being a stay-at-home-mama can be some days (um... actually alot of days, especially in the first 4 months). The only words of comfort I can offer you is that life really and truly will get better, you WILL sleep again!! AND their stages are short. All in hind sight of course.
p.s. remember I'm only accross the street, I love to babysit little babies, and I owe you several hours!! Take me up on it and sneak in a nap!!
I feel like the only time I go on my blog is to whine...you should try it more...great way to vent!!Hope you get some sleep soon!
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